Why men have extramarital affairs?
Talk about a loaded issue that no one wants to speak about, this is it. Funny thing, affairs have been going on ever since old ages. Extramarital relationships can be burdened with troubles, cause sadness, and other problems. Plus you have to wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness issue, finances, age difference, faith upbringing, remorse, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, lonely wife looks for dating.
Why do married people have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are seek an extramarital affair. I am sure mostly though it is only the human condition, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and cherished. Here are a few explanations I have run across.
Physically we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and fun, and sex makes us escape the real world for a brief period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people are able to turn the craving on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the stimulation of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another individual, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos people has erected against married dating. For many people the yearnings will overcome their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but society too. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is terribly pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically driven sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not injure your spouse or anyone else? You would need to reduce the hazard you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the biggest group, huge truly. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, apart from they feel happy in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to think about. Your savings are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live together besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them implementing the sex act, at least not with their spouse. An extramarital affair from time to time solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage uharmed.
Ignoring, sorrowfully this is a common groung I fear. One or the other, frequently the male is sexually neglecting his female for a number of reasons. As a male I actually am grateful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “lonely wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, could be it is a shortage of love, could be compassion is vanished, maybe it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Could be we have simply grown distantly, our general concerns diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is conflicting of what you want. Maybe I simply don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The number one reason people give is, they search for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for economic gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair